|         Proverb Fortune Cookie Humor (Note: Determine if this is politically correct for your audience.)          You can throw in a cute diversion to a boring public speaking engagement           by attributing a saying to an ancient Chinese philosopher. Since these           sayings are not attributed to anyone in particular, feel free to change           or update them to fit your situation and to enhance their humor. This         adds to your dynamic public speaking skills. (The term 'original' here means as original as something can be after           being recited and translated for several hundred years.)  Original: You cannot prevent the birds of sadness from flying over           your head, but you can prevent them from nesting in your hair. Update: You cannot prevent the birds of sadness from flying over your           head, but you can prevent them from pooping on your Gucci blazer.
 Original: He who walk on eggs should tread lightly. Update: He who walk on eggs should find out the price per dozen.
 Original: People who live in glass houses should not throw stones.           Update: People who live in glass houses should pull down the blinds.
 The contrast of the update to the original provides the humor, and           is involved in dynamic public speaking skills.                       |